Previously on The Dumb and the Listless:
Several MLB players were connected to the use of performance-enhancing drugs from the now defunct rejuvenation clinic, Biogenesis of America. Ryan Braun agreed to a suspension of 65 games, ending his 2013 season, while accusing of a past urine analyst of being an Anti-Semite and Cubs fan. Which is worse in Brain’s eyes is anybody’s guess. Antonio Bastardo, Everth Cabrera, Francisco Cervelli, Nelson Cruz, Fautino de los Santos, Sergio Escalona, Fernando Martínez, Jesús Montero, Jordan Norberto, Jhonny Peralta, César Puello, and Jordany Valdespin all agreed to 50-game suspensions without the right to appeal.
Alex Rodriguez, also implicated in the Biogenesis scandal, did not come to an agreement with MLB over a suspension, which was finally served as a whopping 211 games and would finish off his 2014 season. Presently, Alex Rodriguez is the only player implicated in Biogenesis that is still playing, due to his appeal of the suspension. MLB had originally threatened A-Rod with a lifetime ban if he did not agree to his initial suspension.
During MLB’s investigation, Alex Rodriguez was rehabbing in the New York Yankees farm system after hip surgery. A tweet by A-Rod about his progress was answered by Yankees general manager Brian Cashman, who stated that A-Rod should “just shut the f— up.”
Alex Rodriguez finally joins the Yankees under appeal of his suspension. It is later suspected that someone within A-Rod’s inner circle leaked the name teammate Francisco Cervelli in the Biogenesis proceedings, and is soon plunked on the elbow by Boston Red Sox pitcher Ryan Dempster. The lines are drawn as to whether or not this was a tactful approach that most baseball players wished they could have achieved themselves.
You’d think this sort of storyline would eventually fade out and make way for something more interesting like, I don’t know, actual baseball games, but that isn’t the path that Alex Rodriguez follows. Instead, he follows a path of scandal, intrigue, and the over-use of the term “polarizing” that is usually reserved for soap opera episodes and segments of “The Real Housewives of [enter place here].” Sports? Who cares about sports? You know, except for sports fans, that are the reason professional sports make so much money?
Now the web of A-Rod gets deeper. His lawyers plan to file a malpractice lawsuit against the New York Yankees’ team doctor, Chris Ahmad, with the belief that Ahmad misdiagnosed A-Rod’s hip injury. GM Brian Cashman is afraid to say anything besides “Hello” to A-Rod when he sees him for risk of inciting a lawsuit of whatever other nature the player and his lawyers may perceive. Joseph Tacopina, one of Rodriguez’ lawyers, was interviewed by Matt Lauer and explained how he would “love nothing more” than to open the books on everything pertaining to Alex Rodriguez, the New York Yankees, and Major League Baseball in regards to PEDs, but cannot due to the confidentiality clause of baseball’s drug policy.
“If the vice president of Major League Baseball would be good enough to waive the confidentiality clause, I’d love nothing more than to talk about Alex Rodriguez’s testing history, various things,” Tacopina said. “I would love nothing more.”
Matt Lauer then presented Tacopina with a letter from the office of MLB, stating their willingness to waive this policy. Tacopina did not sign it.
All of this drama with his team, his association, and his ridiculousness, and Alex Rodriguez is still playing baseball. All we need is a couple of flashbacks and the ghost of Babe Ruth rising from the grave and we may have the most ridiculous soap opera ever.