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Finally a Good Look at that Rex Ryan Bling

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Photo by Ron Antonelli/Getty Images

East Rutherford, NJ: It’s not easy being a Jets fan. You have to deal with the constant jeering from Giants and Patriots fans, who have won more Super Bowls combined than the Jets have been in the playoffs. You have to watch management clear roster and cap space to sign and resign a USC quarterback. You have to give up on wearing jerseys because you’re never sure who’s coming and going, even when it comes to a defensive player, and you don’t want to spend the money on a Wayne Chrebet jersey.

But it’s even harder when your head coach is more the center of attention than the players.

Of course, that’s if you can’t find the humor of a coach that:

  • Looks like Gary Busey’s long lost brother
  • Cut his diameter in half with stomach-banding
  • Has a foot fetish
  • Has a tattoo on his arm of his wife wearing nothing but a Mark Sanchez jersey
  • Went running with the bulls of Pamplona

That’s a lot of background on a football coach. And don’t tell me, “That’s NY for you.” All we know about Tom Coughlin is that he’s worn khakis every day of his life, and he drafted his son-in-law Chris Snee so he could keep an eye on him for his daughter.

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(Photo by Ron Antonelli/Getty Images)

We thought last year’s BUTTFUMBLE insanity would make the Jets keep things closer to the vest this year and, besides a quarterback controversy or 3, they had. Until yesterday.

Yesterday was the day that the Rex Ryan bling was unleashed upon the world as Ryan became so energetic that he had his version of a nipple-slip. His bling came out, a diamond-studded platinum cross and dog-tag. Never before has a coach sported more bling than all of his players combined, but this is Rex Ryan. The rules do not apply.

To be fair, Ryan has probably owned this bling for awhile. We’ve seen the chain around his neck. Many of us believed it was the white-gold strand of his practice whistle. Now we know. It is bling. Glorious, flashy, bling that Deion Sanders would be proud of.

 

About Author

Patrick is a self-proclaimed NFL analyst, critic, and lampooner, but he has also been known to provide commentary on baseball, basketball, hockey, MMA, and even cricket one time when he was delirious. Patrick is also a major homer when it comes to sports teams in his home state of NY, although he reserves the majority of his mockery to those teams. His heartbreaking teams are the New York Jets (football), New York Knicks (basketball), New York Islanders (hockey), Long Island Lizards (lacrosse), and evens it all out as a fan of the New York Yankees (baseball).