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A Noob in Fantasy Football Stage 11: Week 9


Most of what I learned about fantasy football has been from watching The League on FX. We’ll see how that holds up as I explore my first season in a fantasy football league.


Stage 11: Playing Week 9

Record: 6-3



I swapped Carolina’s defense for Tennessee because, seriously, what is Kellen Clemens going to do with the Rams? Probably a lot less than Matt Ryan will do against the Panthers.

Wow, was I wrong. Ryan couldn’t give up the ball fast enough, leading to the Panthers defense scoring 19 points against the Titans’ meager 6 points.

Philip Rivers (SD): QB1

Projected Points: 72

Word on the street is that the Redskins are getting tougher in coverage. I seriously doubt that they all of a sudden remembered how to play defense with the Chargers coming in, so I’m starting Phoenix Rivers over Matt Ryan and his Amazing Anomalies against the Carolina Panthers.

Results: 83

Looks like I was right, especially considering Ryan threw up all over the field. Metaphorically, of course..

Antonio Brown (PIT): WR1

Projected Points: 17

A big, fat game between the Steelers and Patriots? Joy! I fully expect lots of throwing, maybe some catch, and a little bit of running between Big Ben and Antonio Brown. No Aqib Talib? No problem!

Results: 18

No problem scratching out the expected points, but no big game, even while the Steelers got further and further into the hole during the 4th quarter.

Harry Douglas (ATL): WR2

Projected Points: 17

With Demaryius Thomas on bye and James Jones hurt, I have to start Atlanta’s #1 receiver, Harry Douglas. Who? Exactly.

Results: 11


Alshon Jeffery (CHI): WR3

Projected Points: 11

Sometimes, I like to play sneaky, taking the good 2nd receiver of a team in case the top receiver is double-covered. Alshon Jeffery is that guy. Considering I was rolling into the Monday night game 38 points down, I had to take a shot on this or a questionable James Jones.

Results: 17

The good news is, I picked right. James Jones only scored 2 points. Didn’t help my cause, but sometimes the little victories make the big losses bearable.

Jamaal Charles (KC): RB1

Projected Points: 22

Who has two thumbs and the new #1 fantasy football running back? This guy.

Results: 15

Well. That was awkward.

Le’Veon Bell (PIT): RB2

Projected Points: 12

The Steelers/Patriots game was all set up for me. The Steelers would push the Patriots defense wide with the pass, and Bell would run through the seams, just like the Steelers of, well, every year.

Results: 17

Well, I got it half right. Nothing spectacular but, considering how erratic running backs have been, not too shabby.

Jimmy Graham (NO): TE

Projected Points: 12

Considering what he did last week on a limited snap count, I have decided that even if Jimmy Graham lost both his legs, I would still start him over any other tight-end out there. I made a joke before about starting him on his bye week, and this really isn’t that far off from the truth now.

Results: 42

See? Graham even got hurt and was being worked on by the training staff, and he still went out and caught a couple more balls. I’m officially getting rid of Heath Miller next week.

Steven Hauschka (SEA): K

Projected Points: 8

Hopefully the Seahawks can get down the field a bit more than last week. You know, more than twice, for two touchdowns, which leaves me with 2 measly fantasy points from Hauschka.

Results: 9

Much better. Not good enough when your opponent’s kicker puts up 16 points, but much better .

Titans (TEN): DEF/ST

Projected Points: 8

What can the Rams possibly do against the Titans defense?

Results: 6

Apparently enough to make this into a real game. The Rams didn’t win or anything but, considering the score, they might as well have.

How I Did


Week 9 Points: 218

Total Points: 1,800

It seems that other teams are waking up and playing me hard. This time, The Jibsters decided to demoralize me by picking up the kicker of the team I actually root for, the Jets. At the same time, every time Jimmy Graham scored a touchdown was bittersweet because it was also against my Jets.

By the time it was all over, I was looking at Monday night’s game with one receiver left and behind 38 points thanks to Andre Johnson lighting it up for my opponent. Suffice to say, it didn’t end well.

Coming up next, Stage 11: Week 9 tinkering, playing, and (hopefully) winning.

Stage 1: Setting Up Your Fantasy Football Team

Stage 2: The Draft! Well, Not Really…

Stage 2.1: The Official Draft

Stage 3: Playing Week 1

Stage 4: Playing Week 2

Stage 5: Playing Week 3

Stage 6: Playing Week 4

Stage 7: Playing Week 5

Stage 8: Playing Week 6

Stage 9: Playing Week 7

Stage 10: Playing Week 8

Stage 11: Playing Week 9

About Author

Patrick is a self-proclaimed NFL analyst, critic, and lampooner, but he has also been known to provide commentary on baseball, basketball, hockey, MMA, and even cricket one time when he was delirious. Patrick is also a major homer when it comes to sports teams in his home state of NY, although he reserves the majority of his mockery to those teams. His heartbreaking teams are the New York Jets (football), New York Knicks (basketball), New York Islanders (hockey), Long Island Lizards (lacrosse), and evens it all out as a fan of the New York Yankees (baseball).